Have Fun

That's the advice my godmother has given me about my interactions with "Pro." I explained the situation and she was leery as always but more so because he's the combination of all the things that haven't worked out for me in the past.

 Her advice was to do exactly what I've been doing: if he doesn't call for two weeks but then suddenly does, treat him the same way. Essentially don't sweat him and if I am sweating him, don't let him see that I am. Easier said than done.

Especially since I have that adage of "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and expecting to get different results." Like maybe my way of holding in my feelings until a guy shares his is what gets me in trouble. But then in the end, I always feel like I still gave in too soon and should have made him work for my affection, so maybe that's the part I need to change.

 To say I'm torn is an understatement. So all I can do is pray for an answer on how to get him to put me on the short list of people he'll communicate with during his six-week stay in New Zealand.

He's said he's only going to e-mail and Skype people and I believe if I were on that list, things could turn around for us. To quote my fave crooner John Legend "Heaven Only Knows."