Ok, so as I've been working out, I've been listening to my ipod again. And thus this entry was born. Here are my top 10 breakup related songs. Let me know what you think.
10. Stupid Boy- Sarah Buxton
9. Not Gon’ Cry- Mary J. Blige
8. All My Friends Say – Luke Bryan
7. Knock Knock- Monica
6. Cigarettes- The Wreckers
5. Long Gone- Lady Antebellum
4. Since You Been Gone- Kelly Clarkson
3. Fine- Mary J. Blige
2. I’m Gonna Find Me Another You- John Mayer
1. Should Let You Go- Keyshia Cole (Feat. Amina)
Tuesday
Love is Free
If Sheryl Crow's new song "Love is Free" was one of the free iTunes "Single of the Week," then it would be one of those songs that would get the bad reviews.
Anyone who knows me knows that I'm a BIG music buff so I have to surf the radio (all stations) to find the best music. There was a time where I'd watch VH1 but since I don't have a TV at my desk anymore, I have to rely on the radio...
But back to the story:
Since today was Tuesday my original plan for tonight was to go Best Buy (Target, actually but that's another story) and check out the new releases this week, but I didn't get a chance to b/c my co-workers and I decided to celebrate Valentine's Day (a week later).
So, as I came home late I remembered my original plan for the night but decided to keep going past the Target/Best Buy exit. With the promise of "new music from Sheryl Crow" from the DJ, I was hooked to the radio and kept driving. Unfortunately it turned out to be the aforementioned song and thus I was severely disappointed.
If "Love is Free" is any indication as to what love is, I certainly wouldn't want it. Sorry Sheryl, the song sucks. It sucked when you performed on GMA and it sucks now on the radio. Please don't torture us with a video or by selling it to a sponsor so we have to hear it on every commercial break...
I think we're better off singing Sarah B's catchy (read: bubble gum) pop song "Love Song" track. Even if we don't understand the song or all of what she's saying, the pounding piano chords and her strong vocals make you bob your head.
Anyone who knows me knows that I'm a BIG music buff so I have to surf the radio (all stations) to find the best music. There was a time where I'd watch VH1 but since I don't have a TV at my desk anymore, I have to rely on the radio...
But back to the story:
Since today was Tuesday my original plan for tonight was to go Best Buy (Target, actually but that's another story) and check out the new releases this week, but I didn't get a chance to b/c my co-workers and I decided to celebrate Valentine's Day (a week later).
So, as I came home late I remembered my original plan for the night but decided to keep going past the Target/Best Buy exit. With the promise of "new music from Sheryl Crow" from the DJ, I was hooked to the radio and kept driving. Unfortunately it turned out to be the aforementioned song and thus I was severely disappointed.
If "Love is Free" is any indication as to what love is, I certainly wouldn't want it. Sorry Sheryl, the song sucks. It sucked when you performed on GMA and it sucks now on the radio. Please don't torture us with a video or by selling it to a sponsor so we have to hear it on every commercial break...
I think we're better off singing Sarah B's catchy (read: bubble gum) pop song "Love Song" track. Even if we don't understand the song or all of what she's saying, the pounding piano chords and her strong vocals make you bob your head.
Saturday
And so I deleted...
The other night I started thinking about trust. Like at what moment do you know you can trust someone in a relationship, or do you always trust them and then something happens and that trust is broken.
So as I was thinking about that I started thinking about my best friend and how he showed the ultimate trust in me. One day he called asking for a favor-he in turn gave me his email address and password and asked me to log in to open an email and give him some information. And I did-and i immediately logged out. But most importantly, I didn't try to write the password down or memorize.
I got in, got what he needed and got out. Later, another friend remarked what trust or faith he had in me to call me and ask me to do that. And I shrugged it off because I thought that's the way all things should be.
But I was naive and I now know that all relationships do not have that level of trust. I started thinking about today and what would happen should I need that same best friend to retrieve and email for me-what would happen if he decided to check a few things out and I realized my email account was filled with emails from the past that I didn't want to bring into the future.
And so, I deleted. Everything. In my yahoo, to my facebook to IM convos I saved because I thought they were special.
Not that i'm trying to hide anything, but when you decide to move on, there's no reason to let people in your past remain present and potentially ruin your future.
So as I was thinking about that I started thinking about my best friend and how he showed the ultimate trust in me. One day he called asking for a favor-he in turn gave me his email address and password and asked me to log in to open an email and give him some information. And I did-and i immediately logged out. But most importantly, I didn't try to write the password down or memorize.
I got in, got what he needed and got out. Later, another friend remarked what trust or faith he had in me to call me and ask me to do that. And I shrugged it off because I thought that's the way all things should be.
But I was naive and I now know that all relationships do not have that level of trust. I started thinking about today and what would happen should I need that same best friend to retrieve and email for me-what would happen if he decided to check a few things out and I realized my email account was filled with emails from the past that I didn't want to bring into the future.
And so, I deleted. Everything. In my yahoo, to my facebook to IM convos I saved because I thought they were special.
Not that i'm trying to hide anything, but when you decide to move on, there's no reason to let people in your past remain present and potentially ruin your future.
I think I get it
So tonight I was thinking about relationships and why women fall so hard and I think I figured out one of the main reasons.
Society tells us that today's career woman has to do it all-work, have children, take care of those children and of course maintain a marriage.
And so many women do it that those single women left in the world realize they have have to go with the standard.
So, when you finally find that man that you think you could spend the rest of your life with, you want to divert the rest of your energies not being spent on him towards your career because sooner or later the rugrats are going to come and then you will be the last person your think about for 18 years.
Sad, but true.
And so, that's why we fall so hard when we "think" but not "know" we've found the person.
Society tells us that today's career woman has to do it all-work, have children, take care of those children and of course maintain a marriage.
And so many women do it that those single women left in the world realize they have have to go with the standard.
So, when you finally find that man that you think you could spend the rest of your life with, you want to divert the rest of your energies not being spent on him towards your career because sooner or later the rugrats are going to come and then you will be the last person your think about for 18 years.
Sad, but true.
And so, that's why we fall so hard when we "think" but not "know" we've found the person.
Thursday
"Why Me?"
How many times have we been through a bad relationship or just experiences in life in general and thought, "why me?"
That's how I felt regarding my experience with my ex-boyfriends. I didn't understand why I went through all the unnecessary drama and childish behavior until today.
Today I encountered someone going through all the same things I went through with said-ex and I was able to encourage and possibly enlighten her on a few things I had to learn the hard way as well. They included:
1. When a guy starts listing his faults, pay attention. These will probably surface soon and make you want to run which leads to:
2. When those faults start to surface, RUN! And run fast, you can't think that:
3. You think he'll change from being around you and/or you can change him. You can't, and chances are an old girlfriend(s) told him his faults and:
4. The only way he'll change is if he makes an effort to change. And this doesn't happen within one week or within a few days. These things/issues take months. While he's working on his things, take time to work on things you don't like about you.
5. Finally, it's all about control. Don't let anyone play mind games. If they can't return your calls, then you can't return theirs. Anyone who wants to talk to you will make time and you won't feel like you won't feel like a hamster running in that wheel.
if I had never been through those things, I would never have learned those lessons. Which means I would have been destined to fall for someone else with the same behavior and going through a dangerous cycle.
That's how I felt regarding my experience with my ex-boyfriends. I didn't understand why I went through all the unnecessary drama and childish behavior until today.
Today I encountered someone going through all the same things I went through with said-ex and I was able to encourage and possibly enlighten her on a few things I had to learn the hard way as well. They included:
1. When a guy starts listing his faults, pay attention. These will probably surface soon and make you want to run which leads to:
2. When those faults start to surface, RUN! And run fast, you can't think that:
3. You think he'll change from being around you and/or you can change him. You can't, and chances are an old girlfriend(s) told him his faults and:
4. The only way he'll change is if he makes an effort to change. And this doesn't happen within one week or within a few days. These things/issues take months. While he's working on his things, take time to work on things you don't like about you.
5. Finally, it's all about control. Don't let anyone play mind games. If they can't return your calls, then you can't return theirs. Anyone who wants to talk to you will make time and you won't feel like you won't feel like a hamster running in that wheel.
if I had never been through those things, I would never have learned those lessons. Which means I would have been destined to fall for someone else with the same behavior and going through a dangerous cycle.
Wednesday
Responding to reader comments...
Dear readers,
Please forgive me for not answering your post. It read:
Who said that about God not wanting us to get married? That is not true. Marriage is one of God's greatest gifts and pleasures. He said in the beginning that it is not good for man to be alone - that's why he created Eve. And there are other scriptures about how husbands and wives should treat each other (husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church, etc.) so I don't believe that to be true. If you really love God and serve Him you can love your husband, honor and obey (yes, obey) him and God will bless you because by doing this, you are honoring His word. Didn't mean to preach but don't want you to believe any misinformation.
Yes, it is true that God said it is not good for man to be alone, but later in the Bible he also says that He wants us to serve and put Him first in our life and when we get married sometimes our marriage partner takes the place of God being first in our life. He says that we should be single but if we can't let our fleshly desires get us into sin, then we should get married so we can stay within God's word.
Don't believe me or just don't remember that part? Check out 1 Corinthians 7:8-9.
8 Now I say to those who aren't married and to widows - it's better to stay unmarried, just as I am. 9 But if they can't control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It's better to marry than to burn with lust.
And yes, God provides those guidelines for those who get married because he provides all guidelines for all of us for every action of our life. In fact, before verse eight, Paul dishes out advice to all the married people as told to him by God.
Thanks for reading and posting!
Please forgive me for not answering your post. It read:
Who said that about God not wanting us to get married? That is not true. Marriage is one of God's greatest gifts and pleasures. He said in the beginning that it is not good for man to be alone - that's why he created Eve. And there are other scriptures about how husbands and wives should treat each other (husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church, etc.) so I don't believe that to be true. If you really love God and serve Him you can love your husband, honor and obey (yes, obey) him and God will bless you because by doing this, you are honoring His word. Didn't mean to preach but don't want you to believe any misinformation.
Yes, it is true that God said it is not good for man to be alone, but later in the Bible he also says that He wants us to serve and put Him first in our life and when we get married sometimes our marriage partner takes the place of God being first in our life. He says that we should be single but if we can't let our fleshly desires get us into sin, then we should get married so we can stay within God's word.
Don't believe me or just don't remember that part? Check out 1 Corinthians 7:8-9.
8 Now I say to those who aren't married and to widows - it's better to stay unmarried, just as I am. 9 But if they can't control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It's better to marry than to burn with lust.
And yes, God provides those guidelines for those who get married because he provides all guidelines for all of us for every action of our life. In fact, before verse eight, Paul dishes out advice to all the married people as told to him by God.
Thanks for reading and posting!
My Best Friend's Wedding
Since I speak the truth and only the truth on this blog let's talk about how single women everywhere truly wanted to boycott the writer/director/production company for making My Best Friend's Wedding.
I mean really, how many single women really wanted to see the women who had been there for her best friend over the years take a backseat to a younger, off-key singing ditsy blonde. Any woman who has ambition knows that sometimes you have to choose what's best for your career over having a steady man in your life. And if you are blessed, you will have a man who will understand that he will support you while he does his own thing.
But as we know men, think more about their needs than those who love them so they go off and find someone who doesn't even hold a candle to the person who has been there for them before and expect that person to be happy for them.
In the words of my father, "tough titty said the kitty." Yeah, it's a bit crass, but it is the stone cold truth. There is no way you can expect someone who has had feelings for you and has never gotten over them to be truly happy for them. It just doesn't work that way. At least I've never seen it happen.
Yes, Julia Roberts had a friend to help her get over the sting of seeing Dermot Mulrooney go off with Cameron Diaz, but that was just that night. What happens for the rest of the nights of her life? I can tell you what, they didn't show that because then everyone would have run back to the office to get their money. Reality doesn't work in the world of make-believe. Women want their happily ever afters after all they paid their 8.25 for it, so give it to them.
I mean really, how many single women really wanted to see the women who had been there for her best friend over the years take a backseat to a younger, off-key singing ditsy blonde. Any woman who has ambition knows that sometimes you have to choose what's best for your career over having a steady man in your life. And if you are blessed, you will have a man who will understand that he will support you while he does his own thing.
But as we know men, think more about their needs than those who love them so they go off and find someone who doesn't even hold a candle to the person who has been there for them before and expect that person to be happy for them.
In the words of my father, "tough titty said the kitty." Yeah, it's a bit crass, but it is the stone cold truth. There is no way you can expect someone who has had feelings for you and has never gotten over them to be truly happy for them. It just doesn't work that way. At least I've never seen it happen.
Yes, Julia Roberts had a friend to help her get over the sting of seeing Dermot Mulrooney go off with Cameron Diaz, but that was just that night. What happens for the rest of the nights of her life? I can tell you what, they didn't show that because then everyone would have run back to the office to get their money. Reality doesn't work in the world of make-believe. Women want their happily ever afters after all they paid their 8.25 for it, so give it to them.
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