So, on one of my favorite study movies, "Finding Forrester," William Forrester tells the young student that the key to a woman's heart is an unexpected gift at an unexpected time.
Well, considering that my sister and I watch many of the same movies and can start a line and the other finish it, the odds that she watched this movie are pretty great.
But little did she know that these words would come to mind when she sent me a Christmas/birthday/Valentine's Day gift as a surprise. I came home to an indescript package on my doorstop and when I opened my eyes started twinkling when they landed on a little blue box. Need I say more?
It was the perfect addition to my growing collection and I can't wait to add another peice one day. Thanks sissy, you will always be in my heart.
Thursday
I’m not trying to jinx it but…
Ok, first let me state I don’t believe in jinxes, luck or any of that stuff people say to lessen the power of God. I believe in favor and miracles and of course, BLESSINGS! But you gotta admit, when you read the title, you had to keep reading right?
So the “it” I’m referring to happens to be a wedding. I still have some hope that at one day someone will actually be able to drag me down the aisle and when they do, I observed a few things at my friend’s wedding that I will keep in mind for the day I say I do.
1.Beautiful dress- by now I’ve been to my share of weddings but I hope that on my wedding day someone can say that my dress was the best wedding dress they saw, which is exactly how I felt about the bride on this day.
2.No alcohol- sure, a few of my alchie friends stopped at the corner store to get some spirits before the reception but I celebrated thieer decision to not serve the adult beverages. Knowing the potential consumptions of some friends and family combined, I’d have to think if we did think about serving alcohol it definitely would not be an open bar. Which brings me to…
3.Invites- the girl I was sitting next to at the reception was currently in the process of planning her own wedding for June of this year. I was annoyed by her blunt observations of what she would and wouldn’t do for her wedding (doesn’t she know we are supposed to just keep mental lists and blog later??), although I also wondered if secretly I was also projecting a little jealousy since she was getting married one month after graduating from college. Despite her actions, she posed an intriguing question that I couldn’t shake when she said to her friend (yes, I was eavesdropping shutup!) “I wonder who will come to my wedding?” Of course, I took that to the next level and thought, I wonder who I want to invite to my wedding.
At this particular wedding there was a mix of family and friends from throughout the years. Since I don’t really have friends from high school and two of the people I still talk to will probably be in the wedding, I don’t see myself inviting people from high school. My best friend told me that might hurt some people’s feelings, especially one particular classmate who happened to be at this wedding, but as she said that my mind replayed him doing the Cha Cha slide and trying his best to impress everyone with his dance moves and I knew he wasn’t getting an invite. I mean EVERYONE knows you don’t upstage the bride on her big day.
And finally, despite previous posts, I’m really not a person concerned with things but as we walked through the receiving lines to give our congrats and best wishes to the groom and bride (thank you to Emily on Gilmore Girls-I know who gets what) I noticed I was the only person in my group of college friends who had a gift in my mind. Sure, it was a gift card, but hey, I flew from out-of-town and obviously they appreciated the gesture because I had a thank you card in my mailbox just two weeks after the wedding. SO no one who won’t bring a present will be welcome and just because I’ve shoveled out plenty of cash buying gifts for other people, anyone I’ve ever bought a wedding present for will receive an invite.
4.Wedding Party- I’d really rather not have a lot of people pay to be in a wedding, so if my future husband and I are financially able, I’d love to have only two people each and we pay for the dress, shoes, tux rental, etc. If not, then I’d like to at least buy my bridesmaids a Tiffany necklace each as their gifts (more wedding etiquette).
5.Ceremony- so I can’t decide if I like the whole lighting of the unity candle or not. Plus, I’d want live musicians so they can end the songs and no one has to stand around like a dork until it ends. (I’ll have to ask my sister if she can pull the flute out for old time’s sake and do a solo…) The ceremony must be short and sweet because everyone knows I have a short attention span and if I don’t have a notepad to doodle on I won’t have a clue of what’s going on.
6.Flower girls- without a doubt I’m having two flower girls and they go by the name M&M. That is as long as they aren’t like, 10 or older. They are the only two people I’d let upstage me on my wedding.
7.Wedding showers- I will not be a bridezilla and let anyone plan a shower for me that will be themed or make people spend an unreasonable amount of time in Target searching for a gift that someone can use at a certain hour…(sorry, I digress but you get the point). Wedding showers will only take place for people who can’t make the wedding. Sorry singles, you can suck it back out of me when you get married.
8.Ushers- I’m not sure how I’m going to finagle this but I will not have ushers. That is the suckiest wedding assignment ever. I think I’ll just have the programs next to the guest sign-in book and a sign above the chapel doors (or an information section on the wedding invitations that tells people the left side is for the bride, and the right for the groom as well as to turn your cell phones off, and that we WILL START ON TIME).
So those are just a few of the many things that went through my head at the wedding, but don’t worry, I was able to enjoy the moment and see how God blessed another union.
So the “it” I’m referring to happens to be a wedding. I still have some hope that at one day someone will actually be able to drag me down the aisle and when they do, I observed a few things at my friend’s wedding that I will keep in mind for the day I say I do.
1.Beautiful dress- by now I’ve been to my share of weddings but I hope that on my wedding day someone can say that my dress was the best wedding dress they saw, which is exactly how I felt about the bride on this day.
2.No alcohol- sure, a few of my alchie friends stopped at the corner store to get some spirits before the reception but I celebrated thieer decision to not serve the adult beverages. Knowing the potential consumptions of some friends and family combined, I’d have to think if we did think about serving alcohol it definitely would not be an open bar. Which brings me to…
3.Invites- the girl I was sitting next to at the reception was currently in the process of planning her own wedding for June of this year. I was annoyed by her blunt observations of what she would and wouldn’t do for her wedding (doesn’t she know we are supposed to just keep mental lists and blog later??), although I also wondered if secretly I was also projecting a little jealousy since she was getting married one month after graduating from college. Despite her actions, she posed an intriguing question that I couldn’t shake when she said to her friend (yes, I was eavesdropping shutup!) “I wonder who will come to my wedding?” Of course, I took that to the next level and thought, I wonder who I want to invite to my wedding.
At this particular wedding there was a mix of family and friends from throughout the years. Since I don’t really have friends from high school and two of the people I still talk to will probably be in the wedding, I don’t see myself inviting people from high school. My best friend told me that might hurt some people’s feelings, especially one particular classmate who happened to be at this wedding, but as she said that my mind replayed him doing the Cha Cha slide and trying his best to impress everyone with his dance moves and I knew he wasn’t getting an invite. I mean EVERYONE knows you don’t upstage the bride on her big day.
And finally, despite previous posts, I’m really not a person concerned with things but as we walked through the receiving lines to give our congrats and best wishes to the groom and bride (thank you to Emily on Gilmore Girls-I know who gets what) I noticed I was the only person in my group of college friends who had a gift in my mind. Sure, it was a gift card, but hey, I flew from out-of-town and obviously they appreciated the gesture because I had a thank you card in my mailbox just two weeks after the wedding. SO no one who won’t bring a present will be welcome and just because I’ve shoveled out plenty of cash buying gifts for other people, anyone I’ve ever bought a wedding present for will receive an invite.
4.Wedding Party- I’d really rather not have a lot of people pay to be in a wedding, so if my future husband and I are financially able, I’d love to have only two people each and we pay for the dress, shoes, tux rental, etc. If not, then I’d like to at least buy my bridesmaids a Tiffany necklace each as their gifts (more wedding etiquette).
5.Ceremony- so I can’t decide if I like the whole lighting of the unity candle or not. Plus, I’d want live musicians so they can end the songs and no one has to stand around like a dork until it ends. (I’ll have to ask my sister if she can pull the flute out for old time’s sake and do a solo…) The ceremony must be short and sweet because everyone knows I have a short attention span and if I don’t have a notepad to doodle on I won’t have a clue of what’s going on.
6.Flower girls- without a doubt I’m having two flower girls and they go by the name M&M. That is as long as they aren’t like, 10 or older. They are the only two people I’d let upstage me on my wedding.
7.Wedding showers- I will not be a bridezilla and let anyone plan a shower for me that will be themed or make people spend an unreasonable amount of time in Target searching for a gift that someone can use at a certain hour…(sorry, I digress but you get the point). Wedding showers will only take place for people who can’t make the wedding. Sorry singles, you can suck it back out of me when you get married.
8.Ushers- I’m not sure how I’m going to finagle this but I will not have ushers. That is the suckiest wedding assignment ever. I think I’ll just have the programs next to the guest sign-in book and a sign above the chapel doors (or an information section on the wedding invitations that tells people the left side is for the bride, and the right for the groom as well as to turn your cell phones off, and that we WILL START ON TIME).
So those are just a few of the many things that went through my head at the wedding, but don’t worry, I was able to enjoy the moment and see how God blessed another union.
Tuesday
Top 10 Best Post-Break up songs
Ok, so as I've been working out, I've been listening to my ipod again. And thus this entry was born. Here are my top 10 breakup related songs. Let me know what you think.
10. Stupid Boy- Sarah Buxton
9. Not Gon’ Cry- Mary J. Blige
8. All My Friends Say – Luke Bryan
7. Knock Knock- Monica
6. Cigarettes- The Wreckers
5. Long Gone- Lady Antebellum
4. Since You Been Gone- Kelly Clarkson
3. Fine- Mary J. Blige
2. I’m Gonna Find Me Another You- John Mayer
1. Should Let You Go- Keyshia Cole (Feat. Amina)
10. Stupid Boy- Sarah Buxton
9. Not Gon’ Cry- Mary J. Blige
8. All My Friends Say – Luke Bryan
7. Knock Knock- Monica
6. Cigarettes- The Wreckers
5. Long Gone- Lady Antebellum
4. Since You Been Gone- Kelly Clarkson
3. Fine- Mary J. Blige
2. I’m Gonna Find Me Another You- John Mayer
1. Should Let You Go- Keyshia Cole (Feat. Amina)
Love is Free
If Sheryl Crow's new song "Love is Free" was one of the free iTunes "Single of the Week," then it would be one of those songs that would get the bad reviews.
Anyone who knows me knows that I'm a BIG music buff so I have to surf the radio (all stations) to find the best music. There was a time where I'd watch VH1 but since I don't have a TV at my desk anymore, I have to rely on the radio...
But back to the story:
Since today was Tuesday my original plan for tonight was to go Best Buy (Target, actually but that's another story) and check out the new releases this week, but I didn't get a chance to b/c my co-workers and I decided to celebrate Valentine's Day (a week later).
So, as I came home late I remembered my original plan for the night but decided to keep going past the Target/Best Buy exit. With the promise of "new music from Sheryl Crow" from the DJ, I was hooked to the radio and kept driving. Unfortunately it turned out to be the aforementioned song and thus I was severely disappointed.
If "Love is Free" is any indication as to what love is, I certainly wouldn't want it. Sorry Sheryl, the song sucks. It sucked when you performed on GMA and it sucks now on the radio. Please don't torture us with a video or by selling it to a sponsor so we have to hear it on every commercial break...
I think we're better off singing Sarah B's catchy (read: bubble gum) pop song "Love Song" track. Even if we don't understand the song or all of what she's saying, the pounding piano chords and her strong vocals make you bob your head.
Anyone who knows me knows that I'm a BIG music buff so I have to surf the radio (all stations) to find the best music. There was a time where I'd watch VH1 but since I don't have a TV at my desk anymore, I have to rely on the radio...
But back to the story:
Since today was Tuesday my original plan for tonight was to go Best Buy (Target, actually but that's another story) and check out the new releases this week, but I didn't get a chance to b/c my co-workers and I decided to celebrate Valentine's Day (a week later).
So, as I came home late I remembered my original plan for the night but decided to keep going past the Target/Best Buy exit. With the promise of "new music from Sheryl Crow" from the DJ, I was hooked to the radio and kept driving. Unfortunately it turned out to be the aforementioned song and thus I was severely disappointed.
If "Love is Free" is any indication as to what love is, I certainly wouldn't want it. Sorry Sheryl, the song sucks. It sucked when you performed on GMA and it sucks now on the radio. Please don't torture us with a video or by selling it to a sponsor so we have to hear it on every commercial break...
I think we're better off singing Sarah B's catchy (read: bubble gum) pop song "Love Song" track. Even if we don't understand the song or all of what she's saying, the pounding piano chords and her strong vocals make you bob your head.
Saturday
And so I deleted...
The other night I started thinking about trust. Like at what moment do you know you can trust someone in a relationship, or do you always trust them and then something happens and that trust is broken.
So as I was thinking about that I started thinking about my best friend and how he showed the ultimate trust in me. One day he called asking for a favor-he in turn gave me his email address and password and asked me to log in to open an email and give him some information. And I did-and i immediately logged out. But most importantly, I didn't try to write the password down or memorize.
I got in, got what he needed and got out. Later, another friend remarked what trust or faith he had in me to call me and ask me to do that. And I shrugged it off because I thought that's the way all things should be.
But I was naive and I now know that all relationships do not have that level of trust. I started thinking about today and what would happen should I need that same best friend to retrieve and email for me-what would happen if he decided to check a few things out and I realized my email account was filled with emails from the past that I didn't want to bring into the future.
And so, I deleted. Everything. In my yahoo, to my facebook to IM convos I saved because I thought they were special.
Not that i'm trying to hide anything, but when you decide to move on, there's no reason to let people in your past remain present and potentially ruin your future.
So as I was thinking about that I started thinking about my best friend and how he showed the ultimate trust in me. One day he called asking for a favor-he in turn gave me his email address and password and asked me to log in to open an email and give him some information. And I did-and i immediately logged out. But most importantly, I didn't try to write the password down or memorize.
I got in, got what he needed and got out. Later, another friend remarked what trust or faith he had in me to call me and ask me to do that. And I shrugged it off because I thought that's the way all things should be.
But I was naive and I now know that all relationships do not have that level of trust. I started thinking about today and what would happen should I need that same best friend to retrieve and email for me-what would happen if he decided to check a few things out and I realized my email account was filled with emails from the past that I didn't want to bring into the future.
And so, I deleted. Everything. In my yahoo, to my facebook to IM convos I saved because I thought they were special.
Not that i'm trying to hide anything, but when you decide to move on, there's no reason to let people in your past remain present and potentially ruin your future.
I think I get it
So tonight I was thinking about relationships and why women fall so hard and I think I figured out one of the main reasons.
Society tells us that today's career woman has to do it all-work, have children, take care of those children and of course maintain a marriage.
And so many women do it that those single women left in the world realize they have have to go with the standard.
So, when you finally find that man that you think you could spend the rest of your life with, you want to divert the rest of your energies not being spent on him towards your career because sooner or later the rugrats are going to come and then you will be the last person your think about for 18 years.
Sad, but true.
And so, that's why we fall so hard when we "think" but not "know" we've found the person.
Society tells us that today's career woman has to do it all-work, have children, take care of those children and of course maintain a marriage.
And so many women do it that those single women left in the world realize they have have to go with the standard.
So, when you finally find that man that you think you could spend the rest of your life with, you want to divert the rest of your energies not being spent on him towards your career because sooner or later the rugrats are going to come and then you will be the last person your think about for 18 years.
Sad, but true.
And so, that's why we fall so hard when we "think" but not "know" we've found the person.
Thursday
"Why Me?"
How many times have we been through a bad relationship or just experiences in life in general and thought, "why me?"
That's how I felt regarding my experience with my ex-boyfriends. I didn't understand why I went through all the unnecessary drama and childish behavior until today.
Today I encountered someone going through all the same things I went through with said-ex and I was able to encourage and possibly enlighten her on a few things I had to learn the hard way as well. They included:
1. When a guy starts listing his faults, pay attention. These will probably surface soon and make you want to run which leads to:
2. When those faults start to surface, RUN! And run fast, you can't think that:
3. You think he'll change from being around you and/or you can change him. You can't, and chances are an old girlfriend(s) told him his faults and:
4. The only way he'll change is if he makes an effort to change. And this doesn't happen within one week or within a few days. These things/issues take months. While he's working on his things, take time to work on things you don't like about you.
5. Finally, it's all about control. Don't let anyone play mind games. If they can't return your calls, then you can't return theirs. Anyone who wants to talk to you will make time and you won't feel like you won't feel like a hamster running in that wheel.
if I had never been through those things, I would never have learned those lessons. Which means I would have been destined to fall for someone else with the same behavior and going through a dangerous cycle.
That's how I felt regarding my experience with my ex-boyfriends. I didn't understand why I went through all the unnecessary drama and childish behavior until today.
Today I encountered someone going through all the same things I went through with said-ex and I was able to encourage and possibly enlighten her on a few things I had to learn the hard way as well. They included:
1. When a guy starts listing his faults, pay attention. These will probably surface soon and make you want to run which leads to:
2. When those faults start to surface, RUN! And run fast, you can't think that:
3. You think he'll change from being around you and/or you can change him. You can't, and chances are an old girlfriend(s) told him his faults and:
4. The only way he'll change is if he makes an effort to change. And this doesn't happen within one week or within a few days. These things/issues take months. While he's working on his things, take time to work on things you don't like about you.
5. Finally, it's all about control. Don't let anyone play mind games. If they can't return your calls, then you can't return theirs. Anyone who wants to talk to you will make time and you won't feel like you won't feel like a hamster running in that wheel.
if I had never been through those things, I would never have learned those lessons. Which means I would have been destined to fall for someone else with the same behavior and going through a dangerous cycle.
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