Monday

"Marriable" rocks my world

The other day while shopping for a certain someone's Valentine's Day gift and a gift for another special person in my life, I stumbled across a book on marriage in the Christian bookstore.

Yes, I'm always skeptical of self-help books or at least afraid to actually purchase these kinds of self-help books in public, but the idea of finding out the "Top Lies Women Tell Themselves about Relationships" sounded too good to pass up and if it were good info, too good not to pass along to my single friends.

So I purchased the book "Marriable" and let's just say I was engrossed, possibly even obsessed with it until I finished it. The book contained a lot of truths that I honestly knew all along but let myself ignore because the rest of society was going along with the lies.

They addressed the nice guy/bad guy predicament so much better than other people have in the past. Overall the advice this married couple doled out as a result of their relationship mishaps was comforting but also encouraging to know that if you are making mistakes or have made them in the past then there is still hope to get it right and be the person you need and want to be for the person God has for you.

Of course it blew the door wide open on my latest life addition's theory on being friends before dating/marriage and I'm not sure I have the heart to share or completely side with them but again, some of the truths behind their advice are just too true to ignore. And I speak from experience.

On the other side, I can see where taking their advice on not being "so available" (c'mon ladies how many times have we heard this before) can have an impact on a relationship. As they stressed over and over again, men love a chase and don't like to talk on the phone so if they call you, don't answer every time even if you are available to talk. And when you do get on the phone, limit convos to 15 mins (okay I'm amending this to 20-25) tops because men do not equate length of conversation with like or love. It's a necessary evil to date/marry you but it's not anything that they want to willingly do.

After I finished the book on Saturday, I purposely began stretching the amount of time before responding to texts and not answering every call from my "friend" and the past two nights I was the first to suggest we get off the phone. Last night, he jokingly remarked that he noticed that "I've been rushing him off the phone lately and he doesn't like it." But for me, it was proof that LESS IS MORE when it comes to talking to men. He only remembers half of what we talk about so it would be better to have quality conversations instead of telling him something that I think is important and then getting angry when he doesn't remember on a later date.

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