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Guys want to have their cake and Blue Bell too

Ok, so yeah I was a little hungry when I came up with that expression but lately it has been become very appropriate for the guys I've encountered.

These aren't the average men you think of when you hear about men who cheat on girlfriends or talk to multiple women at a time. No, these men are sweet, caring, have jobs, college degrees and who knows what else that make them the cream of the crop.

It's probably those things that help them realize they are indeed the cream of the crop and therefore, they know they can get any, or in this case, as many, women as they want.

Essentially, they want their cake (their main squeeze, girlfriend, wife, whatver, etc.) and Blue Bell too.

A few months ago a male friend/associate sent me an email containing the four women in every "players" life. There was the wifey, baby girl, side piece and the jump off.

I immediately though back to the relationship I had just gotten out of. I was obviously the wifey...or was I? I mean I had all the makings of the wifey: independent, loving...the one the man always came back to when he was wrong...

But then I thought about the reason we broke up. Or shall I say the person? Could I have thought I was the wifey but instead I was just baby girl? The one he kept on reserve in case the true wifey messed up.

And then I realized that in the case of two men locally I was obviously the side piece. The person they got along with and could see themselves with but never truly acted on it. In one case I KNEW he had an on-again off-again relationship but didn't care about it until they became engaged. That was a line I could not cross. And I didn't, buthe tried to.

And when he got really desperate, he tried to peddle his brother off on me. That match-making incident didn't turn out too well. It's amazing, because if I ever hear another brother say sistas don't give brothas a chance, I'm going off. But I'll go into more detail on that in a later post.

And then there was my favorite. The guy from my hometown who really put a smile on my face and a flutter in my stomach whenever I saw him. When brother guy a got engaged earlier this year, I thought for sure that it was a sign that hometown guy and I would have a chance.

NEGATIVE.

Today after several months of random text message exchanges and a full three hours of talking last week he drops the bomb on me that he has a girlfriend. No, wait. a "girl."

Note to men reading: stop being lazy. Add the word friend to the word girl. She's your girlfriend. If you decide to commit to her, you should commit to calling her your girlfriend.

And to the engaged dudes- call your fiance your fiance. She's no longer your girlfriend, she's YOUR FUTURE WIFE! (yes that was for brother guy).

But back to the story. The guy drops this bomb on me and he is going to her folks' anniversary celebration. That means he's in DEEP. And that he just wanted to have his cake and Blue Bell too-and that expression is extremely appropriate since we have the same hometown.

I'm sick of this. I gotta get out of here. And soon.

Editors Note: I just love the title of this entry. Especially considering I just bought more Blue Bell ice cream this weekend-sorry I just can't get off "the stuff."