Double Standards Need Not Apply

Recently I had the opportunity to begin preliminary dating conversations with a young man I met while volunteering...

Initially when I saw him I thought he was a little immature and possibly dating someone else at his office so I kept my distance.

But he was always polite and when I found out he was a player for the ABA team I (briefly) volunteered for earlier this year, we talked and traded numbers with the intent to workout together.

A number of personal things happened in my life that prevented me from working out with him living at least 45 minutes away so we would keep in touch via text messages.

Finally one of us decided we should try to see if we could be more than friends. Let's just say his checklist looked good:
1. He knew what he wanted out of a relationship
2. He had a job and was looking for another opportunity that he enjoyed more.
3. He had a servant's heart--desiring a career as a fireman or police officer
4. He was my age
5. He was enrolled in grad school
6. He played basketball

But there were some xs on his list as well;
1. He didn't go to church (often)
2. He has a bad memory
3. He had a child.

I tried to go along with seeing where it could lead but I found that one thing I couldn't get over was his envoking a double standard.

I don't claim to have all the free time in the world, however my new life style is structured to where I can make time for anything I feel is important. The other night he said he didn't know if he could be in a relationship with someone "just as busy as him" because once he started to like someone he wanted to spend as much time with them as possible.

Are you serious? Is this not 2009? Do you realize that to find a woman who is okay with you having a child and a busy schedule, you probably don't want someone who has a lot of time on their hands??

At any rate when I stopped answering his text messages not long after that conversation, he began to text even more and finally he told me he didn't want to lead me on but that he'd starting getting serious with someone else.

I told him I appreciated his honesty and I hoped it worked out for him.

So that's 0/2 relationships in 2009 and 2/0 relationships ended via text message for me.

Let's see what the final three months bring.